20 Months - Benjamin

The last several weeks with Ben have been a little challenging for me. Where do I start.  If I'm honest, it's not much fun hanging out with him lately. I come home after work and for the entire evening, practically all I hear from him is "no mama", little tantrums and begging to watch Hot Dog Mouse or Choo Choo Train. I feel like in return, I'm saying "no" to him all evening long! No, don't hit...No, we can't watch TV...No, you can't eat Graham Crackers for dinner....No, you can't climb the 20 foot ladder all the way to the top...and every time we say no, he throws a little fit.  If I try to help him or play with him, he almost always says "no mama".. Generally, he doesn't want me to play games with him, look at him, kiss him, put him to bed, make his food...nothing. He wants Joel to do it all....And it starts to hurt my feelings after a while! We have our moments where he'll let me read, but it feels like the majority of the time, he resists me and just wants dad to do everything. His sweet self is still totally there as long as no one (especially me) is interfering with his "flow".
I know all of this is actually good...strong willed people are a good thing! He has such strong ideas of how things should happen or what things are (If he decides something is green, he cannot be argued with ...even if it's really red). He is so so so strongly independent and wants to do everything himself. So, we just let him know that if he needs help, he just needs to ask. If he asks for help, he's totally cooperative, but if we try to "help" before he wants it, we have a total meltdown. I'm glad though...I don't want to be the type of parent to do everything for my kid, so he helps me realize that he's capable of more than I think...and even when he's not fully capable, the best thing for him is to give it a try.

To add to the fun last week, we had about a week of REALLY rough bedtimes. It was taking an hour or more of SCREAMING and hysterical crying before he would go to sleep for nap and bedtime. We finally figured out that he didn't want a sheet on his bed?? As soon as we took the sheet off, he went to bed immediately and has gone to bed perfectly fine since. After he went to sleep, I snuck in and put a blanket under him. Nope, he wasn't having it. He woke up at midnight and said "no banket!" and dumped it over the side of his crib! I wish I knew what he was thinking (other than the obvious: I don't want a sheet on my bed!)

Now, all that being said, I do want to write down a few of his sweet things. He's been getting good at saying "thank you" and "no thank you". Over Christmas break, we really worked on those, as well as "please". So, whenever we give him food or anything, really, he sweetly says "dane dou, mom". We started teaching "no thank you" so that he would have something else to say other than "NO!!!!!*Screaming, stomping and throwing self on floor*"....so that's helping a little. He's also started the classic toddler habit of wanting things repeated over and over and over (he says "'gain").

Here are a few more things I want to remember:

• Row Row Your Boat - he loves to scream during the "If you see a Crocodile" part. This is how he sings it: Woah, Woah, Boat...steam..Woah Woah Boat...cocdile......Aaaaah!!!
• My favorite game is when I'm sitting on the floor and he runs at me from across the house and tackles me and we rock back together. We do this over and over. It's the closest thing i'm getting to a hug lately :)
• He still REALLY Loves going for walks. We go for a walk every afternoon, even in the rain. He knows he has to wear his hat and mittens. On weekends, we usually go for two walks per day. He likes to run while holding Emma's leash. 
• We have little conversations with him. We'll say "guess what" and he says "what" in response. Or, we'll be talking to him or asking him questions and he says "yup" or "yeaaa" in a very conversational sort of tone. Yesterday, Joel gave Ben the phone and we chatted while I was on my way home from work. He told me about watching Daniel Tiger and how DT was scared of a shadow...then he told me it was raining...I asked how his day was and he said "dood (good)". I said I'd see him in a few minutes and he said "bye bye mama"....just little exchanges like that...
• "Uh oh, Happen?" Whenever anything happens...whether he drops something, or falls or something isn't working the way he thinks it should, he says "uh oh, happen?" in the sweetest voice. 
• Ben's song. This one is a mystery. He tells us he wants to sing "Ben's Song". We try to sing various songs, but they're all wrong, so he sings and lists out the family members. I'm not sure if he's making a song up or if they sing a song at Karen's about family members. 
• He weighs 31 pounds right now, for the record.  

One last thing that I want to mention, although I probably don't have the words to describe it...and that is the relationship between Joel and Ben. First off, Joel's patience with Ben is literally endless. Joel spends more time with Ben than I do. He wakes Ben up and gets him ready and takes him to daycare...and picks him up from daycare (until sports start again at the end of January). Joel never seems to tire or run out of energy for playing with Ben. He is always "on" around Ben and fully connects with Ben. Even though it's hard that Ben is kind of Anti-Mom lately, it makes me happy to see those two connecting and playing and loving each other so much. Joel and I met 10 years ago this week....It makes me laugh out loud to think about the Joel I knew then (uh, TOTALLY different)...Never in a million years would I have imagined him to be such a good dad! 

He's trying to put pants on...When I tried to tell him it was a shirt, he wouldn't hear it.

He loves to play in the sink while Joel does dishes. 

Reading. Always Reading.

You can tell from his stance that he just discovered that warm water feels good down there :)

A few more things...

There are a few things that I forgot to mention in my last post...

• Mickey Mouse = Hot Dog Mouse. He's watched a few episodes of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. They always sing a "Hot Dog, Hot Diggity Dog" Song in each episode, so now whenever he sees Mickey MOuse anywhere, he calls him Hot Dog Mouse. 
• Jumping. He is a Jumping Pro!!  He jumps all around the house and loves jumping off of things. My coworker just gave us his love sack (a giant bean bag), so Ben's been having fun launching himself onto that from the ottoman. He's also been jumping up the stairs like a frog. 
• Abby and taking turns. For some reason, at home, Ben always says "HIT Abigail!". Not sure how to respond to that. We always say "oh, let's do nice touches" and then we talk about how it's nice to hug or give high fives. I don't think he hits Abigail at daycare very much...Karen tells us when he does and it's not very often. She's starting to work on taking turns with Ben and Abby. She said that they get pretty feisty with each other and always want what the other one is playing with. So, we're working on that with him as well. Last night he was practicing giving Emma turns with things...although, when it was "Ben's Turn" to play with Emma's ball, Ben put it straight in his mouth, just like Emma does...haha.

And the next two things are only making the blog because this is not a public blog :)

• I turned around for 20 seconds this weekend and when I turned back around, Ben had successfully plugged the Christmas lights in...he has done this a few times since then. Yeah...not cool.
• I was cooking a ton this weekend. I left the kitchen and came back in to find Ben with a paring knife in his mouth like a lollipop!!! 

19 months - Benjamin

Oh Benjamin. What a little character. His talking has taken another step up this past week. We get such a kick out of hearing what he has to say! The other day, I was driving with him in the car and chatting with him about what we were going to have for lunch. I told him we were going to have noodles. He said "No I Not Noodles! No I Not Noodles!". I took that to mean that he didn't want noodles for lunch, so I asked if he wanted a sandwich instead. He spent the rest of the ride home talking about "Bed" (Bread). He says "No I Not" for a few things when he doesn't want to do them. He has also finally learned how to say "yes" and/or nod his head. Before, he would say "no" to any question, no matter what it was. His nod is hilarious. He slowly nods his head up and down with his eyes wide open. Wish I had a picture of it. He continues to like to talk about the people he hangs out with at daycare. He tries to tell us stories about what happens at daycare. He tells us when one of the kids gets sad. He scrunches up his face and does a little "waaaa" when he's telling us about someone being sad. If he doesn't know what something is, he says "uuummm" and looks at us while pointing to whatever it is.

His fiestiness and independence has also taken a step up lately! Yikes! Joel and I are trying to figure out (Fast!) how to deal with all of his new little challenges. He wants to do EVERYTHING by himself, but that's obviously not possible. So...how do we avoid major meltdowns when he's not allowed to do it all himself And then the little things, like how do we get him to listen to us the first time when we say things like "It's time to go upstairs to get ready for bed". Brenna tells me that we'll figure out these little challenges and look back and wonder how it was ever even a question. So I'm writing this down to see what my thoughts will be in a few months :) He has strong opinions on what he wants Joel, Emma or me to do. Basically, he never wants me to do anything. He doesn't want me to sing, dance, throw balls, etc. He says "No Mama, No Mama" whenever I'm doing something he doesn't approve of. Also, lately, he's been waking up in the evening if he hears Emma running around or eating (she eats pretty close to his door). He stands up and says "No Emma!" several times before he lays down and goes back to sleep. It's not bratty when he says it...he just sounds concerned and really wants Emma to stop making noise. They are like siblings that argue. They argue over snacks, toys, space on the couch, the hammock, dad's lap, etc.

He's learning his colors! He knows the words and context for 5 or 6 colors. He gets orange right most of the time...and tonight he correctly identified blue a few different times. We have our christmas lights up in the family room, so he's been practicing his colors with those.

His big things this month have been trains and his "hammock". His "hammock" is a blanket I tucked into the couch and the ottoman. I meant it to be a tent, but he discovered it's a cozy place to play on top of! It's been up for weeks, which makes half our couch unuseable...oh well. If he's not rolling around, snacking, lounging or playing in his hammock, he likes to pile all his toys in there. His other big thing is trains. All he wants to do is watch train videos on our phone or on tv...and he carries his trains (or cars) all around the house. I love watching him try to figure out the magnetic connectors on the trains. The trains (or trucks) sit on the table and park while he's eating. It's really like his toys are his little buddies. He definitely has his favorites and is always on the lookout for those.

Here's his Hammock:

Last weekend was Thanksgiving. We went down to Portland for a few nights to visit my Dad and Michelle. Chauncy and Alan came down for one night, too. It was great! It was so fun seeing my dad and Ben play together. Ben really liked my dad, and my dad was great at being goofy with Ben and showing him cool stuff. My dad texted me today and said it melted his heart to hear Ben say his name (he was calling him papa). Aunt Chauncy got tonnsssss of snuggles after our Turkey dinner! I've never seen Ben sit still for so long and snuggle! Joel, Ben and I all slept in the same room while Michelle, Ci and Alan slept in the living room area...well, on Friday, Ben woke up really early, so we whisked him off to do a little Black Friday shopping and let the others sleep in.

Christmas is a few weeks away, so it's been fun to read Christmas books with Ben and teach him Christmas words (Santa, ho ho ho, nutcracker, and so on). We rented a Christmas Chuggington at the library and have started singing a few Christmas songs.

Ben at this age is so much fun!! It's fun to see his language grow and watch him figure out the world in leaps and bounds. I love his excitement over little things (Christmas lights, showing us his artwork from daycare, seeing a kitty outside...). I cannot wait to see how this fun, sweet little personality continues to develop!!!

Fall Fun

We've had lots of fun these past few weeks! For starters, we've taken a few trips to the Pumpkin patch.

Last weekend, Ben and I went to the Fabela's for the weekend. Chauncy, Michelle, my mom and Steve were also there for parts of the weekend. Ben had troubles falling asleep in a new place, so I got to hold him to sleep and he actually fell asleep with me in my little bed. He hasn't fallen asleep with me since he was 4 months old when I nursed him to sleep in our bed. It was kind of a treat to get some snuggles with him. On Saturday, Chauncy came up and us 3 took the kids to the coolest pumpkin patch. It was free for everyone, except for Lucas. There was so much to do! Baby kitties for the kids to hold, huge slides, hay rides, a huge corn bin, a barn full of hay to play in, animals and much more. We could have stayed there all day! I think us 3 had just as much fun as the kids!

After the pumpkin patch and nap time, we walked to a nearby park and the kids had a blast playing in the huge piles of leaves under the old oak trees by the river. I love Snohomish!! On Sunday, we watched Lucas steal the show at the primary program at church.
Side note about the weekend: Luke gave me two serious talking-to's about drinking wine and coffee. He talked very sternly told me that I need to stop drinking them "immediately". He wants me to pray about the word of wisdom and learn that it's true :) What a sweet little guy!

Yesterday was Halloween. My mom made Ben an adorable Bam Bam costume. He got to wear it at Karen's house and they trick-or-treated at her laundry room door :) Unfortunately, at home, he was pretty cranky and he didn't want to cooperate with a Bam Bam photo shoot. My team at work was Care Bears. The guys were "Don't Care Bear" and "Old-Time Bear".

I had to add this picture of Luke. Coolest Halloween costume ever!

And now it's November! I had to resist the urge to turn on the Christmas Music today...and I picked up Ben's Christmas jammies out of the drawer tonight...but I put them back in. I'll try to resist them for a few more weeks.

Eighteen Months

A year and a half! My baby is a year and a half! Does this mean I stop counting his age in months and refer to him in half-years now?

We had his 18 month appointment today: 29 pounds and 34.5 inches. No surprise, Ben is ahead of the developmental curve. His language development is ahead of the curve and he's above the 95th percentile in height and a little below the 90th percentile for weight. His head is off the chart.

Ben's latest skill is that he has learned how to jump off of things. He expects us to catch him, even if we're not looking. It's hilarious...except when it's scary. Today at the doctor, he was on the exam table and went to jump off (it's like 4 feet up!) when Joel wasn't looking! He's also just started going up and down the stairs upright, just using the wall for a little balance. As far as language goes, he still loves to sing and he sings all kinds of songs. Wish I knew what he was singing. I think he's singing songs he learns at Karen's, but I don't know what they are! He's also gotten good at possessive nouns. Mama's car, Dada's car, Mama's coat, Ben's shoes... chair, milk, juice, and on and on.

At the doctor's office today, Ben was being so silly in the waiting room when it was just us. He was dancing and singing and chatting and climbing. Just being his normal self. But as soon as the doctor walked in, he clammed up into his shell. The few words that he did manage to say, he mumbled and whispered into Joel's shoulder. The doctor commented on how serious he is and wondered if he's always like that. He gets adorably serious and quiet in any new situation or around new people. Even after spending an entire weekend at Brenna's, he still hadn't totally come out of his shell to let his chatty self show. It's so sweet (and pretty interesting to observe). Wonder how that will develop and change as he gets older.

I've had a little extra time with Ben this week. I stayed home sick with him on Monday, and today was a vacation day because Karen is having surgery. We had a wonderful day, so I just wanted to write it down.

He's been a little off the past few days...first he had a little cold and then there was a tooth that was causing some major grief. After sleeping like a LOG last night, he woke up happy as a clam this morning. After breakfast, my mom came over and went for a walk with us. As usual, it was a leisurely walk. We snapped a few pictures along the way.

After lunch and nap, Ben pulled out a bunch of photo albums and snuggled with me as we flipped through the albums. One of the albums was Joel's from high school and early college. Practically every picture was Joel with one girl or another. Ben was great at pointing out Dada, but he thought that all the girls were Mama. Haha. After snuggling and playing for a bit, we ran a few errands and stopped by JoAnn's to pick up some butcher paper, a smock and finger paint (and said hi to Grandma!). He was so good while we were out, so we stopped and fed the ducks on our way home.

Joel had a soccer game after work, so it was just Ben and I all evening, too. This evening, we chased around the house a lot, snuggled, giggled and played. The best way to spend an evening!!

The best part of the day is that I was in one of those moods where I'm totally focused on him and not distracted by anything (my thoughts, my to-do list, etc etc etc etc etc....there's lots to be distracted by). It didn't matter what activities we did...we just "clicked" today and really enjoyed each other's company.

Benjamin 17 months

Joel and I did a little reminiscing today on Ben's 17 month mark. A year ago at this time, Ben was starting to crawl. I looked at 'old' pictures from a year ago and older.... I still can't believe he's ours!! Such a perfect little package.

A few fun things to note lately. For starters, Ben has been trying to dress himself. At first it started with shoes and then Joel's shorts...and now he's trying to put his jacket and shirts on. Last night he spent ten minutes before bed trying to put a shirt on....so persistent yet so patient with himself. As with everything else, he's very adamant about doing it himself unless he asks for help. He never asked for help with the shirt. He just kept working at it, talking it out the whole time. We have a video of part of it and if you didn't understand English, you would easily think that him and I were just having a nice chat the whole time.

Lately he's been very into play doh, coloring and stickers. He colors every day at Karen's and then more in the evening. Today he was pretending like he was making "O's" and "S's" and stars. He kind of was but it was totally by chance :) He likes it sometimes if we sit with him while he works at his little table. If he's been doing it by himself for a while, he'll come grab one of our pant legs and tug us to the table in his typical earnest, serious manner.

Even though the weather has been crummy lately, Ben reaaalllly likes to go for walks. So, we bundle up and head out. He likes to go and go and go....slowly. He stops to look at every thing. Sprinklers, moss, tree roots, ants, flowers....etc. And that's just what he stops to examine in a span of ten feet! But we love it. I'm happy to go exploring with my guy. And if Joel is home, it gives us a nice chance to chat while Ben explores. Ben likes to wave and say "hai" to the passing cars. I love seeing people smile when they see him and wave back :)

I wish I could capture Ben's personality and describe it perfectly in words. I always want to remember him at this sweet stage. Determined. Secure. Solid. And Like I always say, he's so serious. But it's not a sad seriousness...it's more of a focused, honest, calm, quiet seriousness. He's not always like that, though. He certainly has his fun!! He does silly things all the time. How about Yogurt in the hair to make a show? Tickle mom and dad for a laugh? Hide behind the curtains? Gleefully chase Emma?  Jump as hard as he can on his bed with the biggest smile imagineable? Or when I pick him up at daycare, he squeals and runs around and acts so silly. Or today on our walk, he was  happily singing "the leaves are falling down" while trying to skip (he actually looked like he was partially cripple or something, haha). Yup, he's pretty serious but also tons of fun. He gets excited about lots of things but there is always a mellow undertone. As I type about that trait,  it makes me think of my great grandma Edna. She told me once that one of her secrets in life was to always try to keep a patch of peace within her even during the most un-peaceful times.