The other day, we were in the van with Joel's parents. For some reason, Ben got tears in his eyes and started saying that they were happy tears because he loved me so much. Then he said that sometimes love makes him feel sad! Meanwhile Joel and Bill got happy tears from hearing Ben's sweetness. Those Starr men sure have a sensitive side (apparently Grampy was the same way!).
Lately he's been saying things happened a long long time ago. But he says it "Lom Lom Time Ado". He says this ALL the time...he uses it in the stories he's telling or he asks us if something happened a Lom Lom Time Ado. He tries to ask us what a "lom lom time ado" means. That's hard to explain!
Sometime that has been driving me crazy lately is the way he closes his mouth and says "no, no, no" through his closed mouth. He mostly does this when he's really tired. It's so defiant and rude. It's basically the equivalent of someone crossing their arms and stomping their feet. He has this look in his eyes that says he's up for a challenge of wills. It's even more fun when he just repeatedly says "no" through his closed mouth as we're trying to reason with him or tell him what he needs to do. No....no...no...no...no....no....ROAR!!! It's so frustrating!! I sure hope this habit is a quick phase!
Speaking of defiance, his arguing has recently taken a step up. We know we're not "supposed" to argue with him For a while, he would use our words against us. For example, we tell him things like "use your nice voice" or that he can't talk to us in such a way because it's rude...or occasionally we'll have to revert to "Mom and dad make the rules"...Well, he'll use all that against us. If I scold him for something, he'll say "You can't talk to me like that! You need to say it nicely" and then he'll proceed to give me an example of how I could have said it nicer. Or, he'll argue that HE makes the rules. THANKFULLY he hasn't been doing that lately. Maaaaaybe it was a short phase? Maaaaybe Joel and I actually did something right and figured out how to stop that craziness? That's one of the hardest things! We have no idea what the "right" way to deal with any of this stuff is! When he gets into new, bad habits, it kind of takes us by surprise and we have to spend some time talking about the best way to handle it. Another thing we're teaching Ben right now is that he can't always get what he wants. He loooves to say that he CAN always have what he wants. Sorry buddy. I feel like a parrot. Multiple times a day I say "Sometimes we have to do things we don't want to do" or something like that. We tried teaching him the Rolling Stones Song "You can't always get what you waaaaant...." but he changed the words to "You CAN always get what you waaaaant" and he walks around singing it. Very funny....(not). Anyways, I think we're actually starting to get through to him. Lately, I do hear him saying things like "sometimes we get to do things we want and sometimes we don't".
The stories Ben tells at bedtime (and other times) are getting more and more complex. It's so fun to hear his brain! Ever since he was little and was just starting to talk, he's been such a chatter box and bedtime. It's like his brain is defragmenting and processing his day and unloading everything. Lately, that comes in the form of stories. He tells these stories that go on and on and on. He talks so fast! I don't know how he comes up with the details so quickly! I wish I had some good examples of his stories, but retelling his stories would be like me retelling a dream I had...they don't make any sense. And really, his stories don't make a ton of sense. But it's still fun to hear him tell them. He gets SO into them. He makes the most expressive facial expressions and he uses his arms and hands to emphasise things. I guess the words I would use to describe his story telling are enthusiastic, vigorous, intense, SO spirited and passionate! One example I can think of is him telling me about a toy he wants. It's a toy he created in his mind. It is a track with special dinosaurs on wheels to go on the track. He spent 15 minutes telling me all about the track and what it does and what the dinosaurs look like and where all the wheels on the dinosaur are located and what kind of tricks the dinosaurs can do on the tracks. He had been talking about this make-believe dinosaur track for days. If he's having a hard time falling asleep, I'll go upstairs and lay with him and let him tell me stories for 15 minutes or so. This seems to do the trick because he usually goes right to sleep afterwards. I can understand that. Sometimes it's hard to go to sleep when you've got SO MUCH going on inside your head!!
Speaking of bedtime, right now we go upstairs to get ready for bed and read books at 7....lights out at 7:30. It usually takes him an hour to fall asleep. That hour consists of lots of yelling down to Joel and I with random questions. Most nights he asks us what it means to fall asleep. I tell him it's when he gets really cozy and relaxed and he closes his eyes and his brain stops thinking. He asks things like "Does banging my head mean I'm asleep?" or "Do I still breath when I'm asleep?"
I think I mention his enthusiasm in every post I write. But this kid! His enthusiasm is so....awesome? Adorable? Endearing? Intense?...I don't know how to describe it. But I love it!! He gets SO excited about stuff. The excitement emanates from his entire body. Every muscle is wound up with excitement and enthusiasm and energy. Sometimes he clenches his fists and almost shakes with excitement! For example, Whenever he opens a present, he says things like "WHAT?!?! A book??!!! Oh my DOSH!!". Or when we watch movies, he is so animated as he's watching it! We watched How to Train Your Dragon 2 the other night. During the fights with the bad guys, he would almost yell at the screen in excitement and intensity. He would repeatedly ask us if the fights were going to break the TV Screen. haha. If it's just a regular low-key show like Paw Patrol, he doesn't get intense. It's just during intense moments of shows that he really gets wound up. It's adorable to watch. His enthusiasm shows in so many areas though. Another example is his enthusasim for any water activity. We told him that we're going to Sunriver in a few weeks and showed him some pictures of the pools there. Now he talks about it almost everyday. If he's really excited, he almost yells about it. He shows this kind of excitement about cake, donuts, bike rides, new library books, playing with his cousins or seeing Grandma Bev, finding bugs and frogs....sooooo much stuff. I love how much joy he gets from so many small things in life!!
On the flip side of his enthusiasm is his sensitive side. I've talked before about what a snuggle bug sweetie he is. I don't have much to add about that. But in addition to that, he's verrrrry sensitive to bad guys or scary things (fire, etc). He does NOT want to watch movies with bad guys in it. If we're looking for a show to watch, he will ask about every single one whether or not there's a bad guy in it. For some reason he was fine watching How to train your dragon....but he asked about the bad guys/good guys every 2 seconds (is he a bad guy? Is he a good guy? That bad guy is turning into a good guy!). With his normal energetic, enthusiastic self, he usually proclaims that he will FIGHT the bad guy or "FIGHT THE FIRE!!!!!" Very often, his play revolves around fighting bad guys and his brain is always trying to separate people into good guy/bad guy categories. For example, right now he thinks people who don't wear helmets or people who smoke are bad guys. Obviously we're trying to broaden that thinking and help him understand that just because people don't make wise decisions, it doesn't mean their a bad guy....but it's interesting to see how his mind is working and trying to figure things out.
He's also very sensitive to new people. We've finally gotten him to go to church with no tears....but he was going on and on about how he's scared of the kids and he just wants to stand by the wall by himself and not talk to anyone. I understand, kid...really, I do. I remember how PAINFULLY shy I was as a kid (and teenager...and adult...) and how much I haaaaaated it when my parents would make us go to a new class or something with other kids we didn't know. And I even had two sidekicks with me every where I went!! So I really feel for Ben when he says things like that. But....he's gotta learn......poor guy. Once he gets used to people or if he has instant chemistry with a kid, he's totally fine. He opens up and talks to them and plays just fine. He's had several instances recently where he's been around new kids and he ends up playing with them and having a blast and not wanting to leave....so I'm not worried about him socially. I just know exactly what he means when he's scared of the kids and wants to stand by himself!! Below is a pic of him at an easter egg hunt in Yakima with tons of kids.
Just a little update on how he's dealing with my big, growing belly. He's well aware that he's getting a little sister. Most of the time, he's very sweet about it. When I tell him she's kicking, he turns into a sweet pile of mush and puts his hand on my stomach and tries to feel her move. Sometimes he'll give me a random, sweet kiss on the tummy. The other night, he put his mouth right on my tummy and was talking to baby sister, telling her to wake up. He was snuggling my stomach sweetly and using his sweet voice....then all of a sudden he started hitting my stomach. Figures. He's probably not super happy that my stomach has gotten too big for me to carry him.
One last thing to mention is his thoughtfulness. I love how thoughtful he is of others sometimes. For example, Nana and Papa were coming to visit a few weeks ago. He had helped make muffins at the Taylor's. When I picked him up, she packed three muffins (one for Joel, ben and I). Ben made sure that she packed two extras so that Nana and Papa could have one too. Or, he'll randomly ask us how we're doing or how our day was. Sometimes he tells us he's thinking about us...(and other times he tells us he's thinking about himself and he wants to know whether that's nice or not. Interesting).
Seriously...nothing better than cousin time!!
We've gone for a few hikes. On this one, Ben brought his strider bike and mountain biked while we hiked.
Joel walked in his graduation ceremony even though he's far from being done!
I got a pool for me to use this summer. He likes it too :)
